Lots of talk about the ‘me too’ movement and empowerment to those victims, of which I am one, but what happens now?
It’s gone so far past empowerment, to now, anyone says anything, that could be 100% fabricated, would mean person at the other end may lose their job, their family, their friends, over unsubstantiated claims that were false from the get go.
All because this accuser saw there was a massive opportunity to leverage a small lie into ultimatums, blackmail or revenge.
I’m one of those dreamers that wants everything to be fair and just. Unfortunately that’s not how our world seems to be. Some individuals want to use whatever means possible to get their own way, even at the expense of good, fair, respectful people.
Why? Because they can. Who’s there to stop them?
Now how do the people who hold these positions, who are really honest, good, fair people protect themselves from individuals preying upon them with ill intentions or malice?
Likely, if accused, they would all be guilty, at first glance. Or we will all deem them so, because the social media proproganda machine says everyone is guilty until proven innocent, except by the time the truth comes out of innocence, that person’s whole world is destroyed.
I feel for all people in these sensitive positions.
Like teachers and profs, being pushed around by agressive students who don’t like or agree with the grades they are given.
Like bosses who are manipulated in this way by disgruntled employees because they feel they deserve more or got passed up for promotions.
Like parents who have children that don’t like the rules and are ruthless enough to threaten to make an expose of an entirely fabricated situation.
Why am I concerned?
I am a registered therapeutic massage therapist, I have training and education on how to help others with all sorts of musculoskeletal issues.
It requires touching. I do my due diligence to make sure everything is 100% safe, respectful, honest, totally professional.
Lately I hear of an individual in my profession is being accused in this way. I’m torn, do I believe the allegations, do I not. I tend to always side with the victim. It’s my nature.
But what if this was ever to happen to me? What if someone accused me? I know I didn’t do anything wrong, I know this person perhaps had a vengeance for me, and this was their way of getting back at me. What would I do? What could I do?
Ultimately anyone now can destroy anybody else’s life at the drop of a lie. These tactics are no longer just held against Hollywood celebrities and prominent political figures. Now it can happen to you, or me.
It’s scary to think that the only thing that’s stopping this from happening to each and everyone of us is to hope and pray that other people around us are good, honest people.
And unfortunately there are a lot of people out there who are willing to stop at nothing to get what they want.
It’s downright scary.
How do we balance the need for support and empowerment for actual victims, with the ability to protect ourselves from the liars who abuse and cross these lines to just take whatever they want?
Is there a way to protect ourselves?
Honestly, I’m not sure I want to go back into practicing my modality if I’m always going to have to be on my guard about this.
I want to help people, but I would never want to lose my job, my family, my friends, or my good name over someone making up stories.
Lord help us. 🙏
Helen · December 19, 2019 at 11:55 am
Powerful! I, too, belong to the #metoo crowd. Stepparent, date rape, workplace harassment… but thankfully never with a professional. I would also always have to act on behalf of a victim, but would always be mindful that the accused could be innocent. Thanks for writing this.